In 1940 Carson McCuller wrote The Heart is a Lonely Hunter, the story of “five isolated, lonely people in their search for expression and spiritual integration with something greater than themselves.” McCuller’s work was considered to be one of the best novels of her time as she gives voice to the rejected, forgotten, mistreated and oppressed of our society.  As one reads this novel, there can be no question that McCuller at the age of 23 was tapping into something much greater than herself. I am reminded of this novel as I examine my own journey toward the healing of my own heart.  As I descend inward into a place of self-realization and discovery, I wonder how I can give voice to the rejected, forgotten, mistreated and oppressed parts of my own self.

Drunvalo Melchizedek says in his book Living in the Heart that “Entering the sacred space of the heart does not involve a learning process; for we have always been in this space, from the beginning. We have chosen to divert our attention to this way of polarity consciousness, but once we’ve learned the lesson, I feel certain that we will return to the primal state of oneness.”

I was born on August 8, 1957. My zodiac sign is Leo the lion. The symbol for Leo is represented by two valves of the human heart a part of the anatomy that Leo rules. Remarkably, it was not until recently that the synchronistic value of my astrological sign revealed itself to me.  Jean Shinoda Bolen writes that when we are at a significant junction of transition, outer events and meetings are often filled with messages that should be heeded. I have been on this journey long enough to at least take notice when events and messages start to converge in ways that can only be attributed to “Divine Intervention.”

“Is it possible, I asked myself, that I’m being summoned from some deep and holy place within?  Am I being asked to enter a new passage in the spiritual life-the journey from false self to true self? Am I being asked to dismantle old masks and patterns and unfold a deeper, more authentic self- the one God created me to be?  Am I being compelled to disturb my inner universe in quest of the undiscovered being who clamors within?” Sue Monk Kidd, When the Heart Waits.

Last December, I completed my yearly Soul Coaching Collage.  According to Denise Linn, creator of The Soul Coaching Collage®, the creation of this collage is an inner journey that allows your soul to speak to you.  Denise says that your soul’s voice can be heard through the images, feelings and insights that surface from creating this kind of collage.  The lower left section of the board is called “The House of Ancient Wisdom”.  This section relates to the universal ancient wisdom that dwells within you and is also closely related to the seeds that are being planted for the future.  On my collage in this corner I have featured a picture of a fractured heart, the words “ forgive and be free, erase insecurities and the heart of prayer.”  Above all of this is the following mantra: “I started to understand the interconnectedness and how all of us are here, on a soul level to learn love.  All of us has karma that has to be burned up and will play out in a variety of ways, again and again, until we take responsibility for our own experiences.”

I am a U.S. Wish® Facilitator (www.thewish8.com).  The Wish® is an amazing energy game that helps individuals release limited beliefs held from childhood conditioning that keep them from manifesting their wish. The wish also helps individuals see what is hidden from them in their subconscious minds in order to take responsibility for their own experiences.

On the middle of my Soul Coaching Collage® is a picture of a gold infinity symbol with a royal blue background. The infinity symbol is actually part of a flower that I synchronistically covered up with other pictures not realizing until later that I had created an infinity symbol in the process. The color and design are identical to a Wealth Card that was given to me by Louise Laffey, Creator of the Wish® the day that I met her. The Wealth Card speaks to the significance of being in abundance and in my view of being complete. Layered over the top of the infinity symbol are these words “There’s the thing you do for a living- and there’s the thing you were born to do. If your dream is to make them one in the same, you’ve come to the right place. Welcome to your brilliant future! The middle of the collage signifies your sense of self, your identity, your essence or core. It also shows you what is most important in your life right now. Nine months later, I understand. My soul is longing for me to return home to oneness and to remember the truth of who I am.

In January of 2011, I began a six-month course called The Spiritual Warrior, an online program designed to help me better my skills as a spiritual seeker. In February, I read an article written by the creator of The Spiritual Warrior program; Leslie Temple-Thurston called The Power of One. In this article, Leslie speaks about the exponential ripple effect created when a group of individuals comes together with intention centered on one idea or cause.  The next day after reading the article, I received what can best be described as a gestalt of information around an idea called Global Wish. A “gestalt” is an understanding of the whole of an idea in one sensory download.  I knew instantly that Global Wish® could be an important tool toward shifting consciousness on this planet.

As Global Wish evolved, Louise Laffey, creator of the Wish®, was guided to choose August 8, 2011 from 12noon to 2pm as the date and time we would initiate Global Wish™ around the world.  Louise did not know that this date was in fact my birthday, the month in which Leo the Lion, ruler of the heart is front and center on the zodiacal stage. We later decided that the wish that everyone would play for would be “I wish to live in the heart.”

The convergence of messages was beginning to feel like a 20 car pile up on the Major Deegan Expressway in the Bronx.

April 20, 2011- after sharing my thoughts on Global Wish™ with my friend Cindy McCarthy, she sent me an email with a copy of the Mayan Calendar created by world-renowned Mayan expert, Dr. Carl Calleman. It was an instant OMG moment.  From 12 noon on August 8 to 12 noon on August 9 the Mayans predicted a huge influx of energy coming on to the planet that they called  “Cosmic Resonance on a Global Scale.”

May 15, 2011- upon pondering the question “What is my life purpose?” my brilliantly intuitive 24-year old daughter tells me my purpose in life is to be complete.

August 5, 2011- I play the Wish®.  My wish is “I wish to gain clarity on how I can be more open-hearted.” I complete my game and head out for the day picking up my mail on the way out. In the mailbox is a birthday card and gift from my mother-in-law. Our journey together over the last 33 years has been a test of patience for us both. The card front and inside is covered with rainbow colored hearts.  The message is “May all the love you give away…return to fill your heart today.  The name of the card designer is It Takes Two.

August 6, 2011- I play the Wish®.  My wish is “I wish for financial freedom and to claim my inner authority.” As the game unfolds, I draw a block card.  “Are you head-butting a brick wall?  Ask another player for their opinion.”  When I am playing by myself I usually draw a card from one of my oracle card decks.  I was guided to draw from the Ascended Master deck by Doreen Virtue and pulled the Jesus card with the message of “Open your heart to love.”

Everything you desire and every prayer that you seek comes as a result of opening your heart to both sending and receiving love. Your heart is the gateway of receptivity. It is the answer to every question you have about your love life, relationships, health, life purpose, and so forth. The more you allow yourself to love, the greater depth and meaning your life holds…you are protected and safe as you open your heart to love.”

August 7, 2011- On the eve of Global Wish™, my friends Annette and Tom at the Emergence Project (www.theemergenceproject.net) are hosting Dr. Carl Calleman in a teleconference and I am able to speak to him directly about the importance of Global Wish® He tells me that the single most important thing we can all do as we head toward 2012 is make a commitment to unity consciousness.

August 8 2011- 24 women arrive at my home to play the Global Wish™, “I wish to live in the heart.”  The loving energy in my home was so expansive that I could feel my heart ripping open.

August 9, 2011- I wake up feeling very emotional.  Seated at my desk, attempting to get some work done, I am guided to look over at my bookshelf where I see a book that my sister recently suggested I take from my mother’s library called Secrets of the Heart by Kahlil Gibran.  Over the last 53 years, my mother and I have had a difficult relationship to say the least. My mother currently is in a nursing home with dementia. Going through this devastating illness with her has allowed me to experience ”courage” of the heart in my mother that brings me to my knees. I open the book to find a bookmark with a baby bottle of pink hearts and a smiling kitten hanging over the top. The page contains a poetic offering of a story of sorrow and joy.  All of the painful experiences of my childhood come flooding in…but miraculously right behind those experiences flow the memories of the happier times before my heart became so heavy….  a way back in perhaps.

Next, I pull out my syllabus for my Spiritual Warrior program and the paper I am to read for the month of August is called Healing the Heart.

I then head out to my monthly Sacred Circle meeting, a gathering of my spiritual sisters.  We celebrate my birthday with food and presents.  One of my cards reads “Love who you are.”  One of my gifts is an aromatic bottle of lavender contained in a red box with a heart on the top and wrapped in white paper with little red hearts all over it. There is a message with the gift describing the properties of lavender:

Receptivity to the frequency of Lavender- life unfolding in light and beauty.  Use lavender for raising one’s vibration, seeing the truth of who you really are, lifting all of humanity with the purity of who you are becoming.  Raising the mental, spiritual, emotional and physical bodies to the frequency of love.  Shifting through the portal of your heart center into a fully conscious human being.

August 10, 2011- I sit here completing this blog in a stupefied state of utter and complete surrender!

And as I answer the summons from within, as I begin to identify with my true authentic self, I understand for the first time in my life what my beautiful daughter Christen so eloquently tried to tell me so many months before.  My purpose in life is to be complete.  My purpose is to take responsibility for all of my emotions and to learn to love in the process. My purpose is to heal my broken heart through forgiveness and unconditional surrender to the true nature of my being which is oneness and interconnectedness with all life. My purpose is to remember that I have been in this sacred space we call the heart from the very beginning.